Digital Signal Processors

Things that make you feel slightly guilty about your actions!I’m like a spy. I eavesdrop. I think about sound more than most people. And not just cuz I’m a musician. I wear ‘da ma’fuckin hearing aids. Preference is leaning, however, towards referring to them as DSP’s (Digital Signal Processors). I got them to block out sound, actually. They are essentially high-end ear plugs. I can direct audio stream radio, podcasts, iphone, tv, laptop, etc. And I have a mini-mic that direct streams audio from wherever I have that sourced. Usually my girlfriend will wear it while we are driving, and I mute the mics on my ear pieces to block out road noise for a more balanced pleasant sonic experience.

I can control the levels on the fly. I have different programs for restaurant, outdoor, music, etc. In some ways, I think everyone should wear these damn things. Restaurant setting for example has noise compression (or noise cancel?) to block out background bullshit and the device mics are set directionally forward, as opposed to wide range for outdoors so I can hear behind me better. What else? I can use them as in-the-ear monitors like stage musicians and newscasters are using now.

I used to wear noise-cancelling headphones when I drove, to block out road noise, but cops pull you over for wearing headphones. Is it illegal to be deaf? Well I can understand that being the case for hearing people to not listen when they drive, because they are not genetically conditioned to compensate by using visual cues. Did you know Deaf people are statistically better drivers? Anyway, now I just hit mute on my DSP’s, to block out road noise, and then listen to podcasts direct stream into my ears.

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Cochlear Implant Weaponry

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In researching tinnitus, I came across some ideas that made me question if there is a connection between Cochlear Implant industry and Weaponry.

The Hum is a persistent and invasive low-frequency humming, rumbling, or droning noise not audible to all people… Some perceive vibrations that can be felt through the body… Earplugs are reported as not decreasing the Hum.

Microwave Auditory Effect consists of audible clicks (or, with modulation, whole words) induced by pulsed/modulated microwave frequencies… The effect was first reported by persons working in the vicinity of radar transponders during World War II. These induced sounds are not audible to other people nearby… This effect occurs as a result of thermal expansion of parts of the human ear around the cochlea… It was studied for its possible use in communications. Both the United States and USSR studied its use in non-lethal weaponry…

“Microwave hearing may be useful to provide a disruptive condition to a person not aware of the technology. Not only might it be disruptive to the sense of hearing, it could be psychologically devastating if one suddenly heard “voices within one’s head”.

The existence of non-lethal weaponry that exploits the microwave auditory effect appears to have been classified “Secret NOFORN” in the USA… A company announced in early 2008 that they were close to fielding a device called MEDUSA (Mob Excess Deterrent Using Silent Audio)…a directional, non-lethal weapon designed for crowd control and exploiting the microwave auditory effect. It uses microwave pulses to generate uncomfortably high noise levels in human skulls, bypassing the ears and ear drums.

I just found this: Silent Sound..It is “A silent communications system in which non-aural carriers, in the very low or very high audio-frequency range or in the adjacent ultrasonic frequency spectrum are amplitude- or frequency-modulated with the desired intelligence and propagated acoustically or vibrationally, for inducement into the brain, typically through the use of loudspeakers, earphones, or piezoelectric transducers…” such as cochlear implants?

It was actually used successfully apparently in Desert Storm…a special-ops unit of the military referred to as “Psy-Ops” used this technology to broadcast messages over the Iraqi loudspeakers that played alongside the regular Iraqi radio shows . The messages that were being broadcasted were telling the adversary to surrender and also eliciting feelings of fear, angst , anxiety and uneasiness. The next day before a single fire had been shot 1,405 Iraqi troops surrendered, including a general officer (Gulf War, 2010).

I wonder if Cochlear Implants are going to be used in this manner. Will we ALL have to wear a CI’s someday? Is this weaponry a secret agenda and deaf babies are the guinea pigs? Are CI’s a conspiracy? Why are judges taking deaf babies from parents who refuse to put a machine in its’ head, and not allow ASL? To me, it is an attack on Deaf Culture and ASL as a right. But The Hum was interesting because I hear it. And Microwave Auditory Effect, also know as Frey Effect, just made me question if there is a connection with Cochlear Implant industry and weaponry. Is there a connection we should look into?

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Silence is Wholeness

I’m reading an article in NYTimes about someone who lost her hearing as an adult. This quote made me think:

…Practical tips on living and conversing with the hearing-impaired round out the book. (“If they don’t hear what you’ve said after you’ve repeated it two or three times, don’t say, ‘Never mind, it doesn’t matter.’ To the person who can’t hear it, everything matters”…

My theory is that everything does NOT matter. The reason I have this contrary view is because I never got upset when people said nevermind to me. Last night I was reading a sample of a book called Silence: The Mystery of Wholeness The idea is that commerce and profit are all about noise. There is no money in the silence. Maybe this is why Deaf are not accepted, the same way religions have been persecuted. Spiritual leaders recommend meditation and prayer and entering the silence. Yet the busy-body business people want us to run around and spend spend spend. The economy is a noisy world of hustle bustle trade and dealing with import export, etc. Activity and all this external-world consciousness detaches us from our inner life of silence and solitude. The money makers want to profit off of Deaf people by saying we need to listen and play their noisy game of life.

No. I am perfect as I am. In fact, I am closer to spiritual connectedness by virtue of being Deaf. I am complete within. The truth of my wholeness is centered on being ONE with holographic universe, not wearing hearing aids. I don’t need to hear all your noise to be complete. It does NOT matter what you say!

Here are some statements from the book Silence: The Mystery of Wholeness:

Silence is prior to sound, not the cessation (or absence) of sound. It is already present… It never goes away. We go away from it. The secret and this mystery are so revolutionary that all who aspire to commercialize the world conspire to bury this secret in the noise of the world. Happiness and Silence belong together just as do profit and noise. So long as we live in a commercialized world, noise reigns. All the distractions that keep us from the center of our being, where stillness of soul can resonate with Silence, belong to the world of profit.

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Deaf Zen

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16. Bells and Robes

When one studies Zen one need not follow sound or color or form. Even though some have attained insight when hearing a voice or seeing a color or a form, this is a very common way. It is not true Zen. The real Zen student controls sound, color, form, and actualizes the truth in his everyday life.
Sound comes to the ear, the ear goes to sound. When you blot out sound and sense, what do you understand? While listening with ears one never can understand. To understand intimately one should see sound.
When you understand, you belong to the family;
When you do not understand, you are a stranger.
Those who do not understand belong to the family,
And when they understand they are strangers.

20. The Enlightened Man

Shogen asked: “Why does the enlightened man not stand on his feet and explain himself?” And he also said: “It is not necessary for speech to come from the tongue.”
Mumon’s comment: Shogen spoke plainly enough, but how many will understand? If anyone comprehends, he should come to my place and test out my big stick. Why, look here, to test real gold you see it through fire.
If the feet of enlightenment moved, the great ocean would overflow;
If that head bowed, it would look down upon the heavens.
Such a body has no place to rest…
Let another continue this poem.

24. Without Words, Without Silence

“A monk asked Fuketsu: ‘Without speaking, without silence, how can you express the truth?
Fuketsu observed: “I always remember springtime in southern China. The birds sing among innumerable kinds of fragrant flowers.”
Mumon’s comments: Fuketsu used to have lightning Zen. Whenever he had the opportunity, he flashed it. But this time he failed to do so and only borrowed from an old Chinese poem. Never mind Fuketsu’s Zen. If you want to express the truth, throw out your words, throw out your silence, and tell me about your own Zen.
Without revealing his own penetration,
He offered another’s words, not his to give.
Had he chattered on and on,
Even his listeners would have been embarrassed.

9. Reaching the Source

Too many steps have been taken returning to the root and the source.
Better to have been blind and deaf from the beginning!
Dwelling in one’s true abode, unconcerned with that without-
The river flows tranquilly on and the flowers are red.

Comment: From the beginning, truth is clear. Poised in silence, I observe the forms of integration and disintegration. One who is not attached to “form” need not be “reformed.” The water is emerald, the mountain is indigo, and I see that which is creating and that which is destroying.

32. A Philosopher Asks Buddha

A philosopher asked Buddha: “Without words, without the wordless, will you tell me the truth?
The Buddha kept silent.
The philosopher bowed and thanked the Buddha, saying: “With your loving kindness I have cleared away my delusions and entered the true path.”
After the philosopher had gone, Ananda asked the Buddha what he had attained.
The Buddha replied: “A good horse runs even at the shadow of the whip.”
Mumon’s comment: Ananda was the disciple of the Buddha. even so, his opinion did not surpass that of outsiders. I want to ask you monks: How much difference is there between disciples and outsiders?
To tread the sharp edge of a sword,
To run on smooth-frozen ice,
One needs no footsteps to follow.
Walk over the cliffs with hands free.

29. Not the Wind, Not the Flag

Two monks were arguing about a flag. One said: “The flag is moving.”
The other said: “The wind is moving.”
The sixth patriarch happened to be passing by.
He told them: “Not the wind, not the flag, mind is moving.”
Mumon’s comment: The sixth patriarch said: “The wind is not moving, the flag is not moving. Mind is moving.” What did he mean? If you understand this intimately, you will see the two monnks there trying to buy iron and gaining gold. The sixth patriarch could not bear to see those two dull heads, so he made such a bargain.
Wind, flag, mind moves,
The same understanding.
When the mouth opens
All are wrong.

71. Learning To Be Silent

The pupils of the Tendai school used to study meditation before Zen entered Japan. Four of them who were intimate friends promised one another to observe seven days of silence.
On the first day all were silent. Their meditation had begun auspiciously, but when night came and the oil lamps were growing dim one of the pupils could not help exclaiming to a servant: “Fix those lamps.”
The second pupil was surprised to hear the first one talk. “We are not supposed to say a word,” he remarked.
“You two are stupid. Why did you talk?” asked the third.
“I am the only one who has not talked,” concluded the fourth pupil.

-Zen Flesh, Zen Bones, A Collection of Zen and Pre-Zen Writings” compiled by Paul Reps

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Offensive Use of Deaf Label

I subscribe to news, via Google Alerts, with keyword “Deaf”
Here is the title of an article brought to my attention:

“Kaiso judges deaf to brilliant ‘Tainted Legacy’”

Then in the body of the article, here is written: “Helon Francis, whose classy delivery of his brilliant composition, “Tainted Legacy” was completely ignored by the brain-dead judges. What a travesty!”

I am offended that deaf and brain-dead are somehow similar. It is politically incorrect and ignorant. It would be unacceptable to make reference to other minorities in such a way. You couldn’t say, oh the judge was being black and he is brain-dead, or acting like a woman, being brain-dead, or the judge was being gay and he is brain-dead. No.

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Being Hearing Does Not Make You More Whole

Remember that youtube video of woman who hears for the first time?
Well, she came out with a book called Powered On The SOUNDS I Choose to Hear and the NOISE I Dont. I was reading an article about it and she was quoted as saying, “I started realizing that there were others out there like me,” she said. “People who longed to feel whole…” I just want to say that feeling whole and complete should not depend on external circumstances. This is enlightenment 101. Wholeness comes from within. We are all Divine Creatures and are perfect as we are.

Frankly, it is offensive to people who choose to be Deaf. It is audist to assume that people who do not perceive frequencies on the same spectrum as the majority are somehow less human. The problem is intolerance for diversity of linguistic minorities.

I understand people have the freedom to choose what frequency spectrum to allow into their sensory apparatuses. But I do not appreciate being told I am incomplete or less whole because I don’t put a machine in my head. Thank you very much. Deaf Power.

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Cell Phone Hearing Aid

555377_343151892455803_1390452577_nNo. It’s called the other person is selfish for demanding my attention. I use my tech how and when I want. It’s like a hearing aid. Don’t tell me to wear it or not use it. I’ve spent my whole life paying attention by wearing hearing aids. Don’t tell me what respect is. You tell me to wear my hearing aid to hear you, but then tell me not to use my hand-held device. Maybe I have a bluetooth hearing aid and I’m adjusting the sound on my iphone app because you don’t speak loud enough.

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Facebook Still Discriminates Against Deaf

The issue is that Deaf depend on technology to communicate + connect with hearing people. Therefore, Deaf need Facebook more than hearing people. Consequently, the rules should be different for Deaf- it’s called Disability Accommodation. We don’t tell people in wheelchairs to use the stairs, do we? No. We have ramps. Facebook is like a ramp, helping Deaf be mobile with communication. Facebook is the modern hearing aid, helping us know what is happening in the world. images

How can Deaf ‘know’ people, like hearing people, for whom it is so easy to meet each other on the street or neighborhood first, then they can ‘friend’ on Facebook. Deaf don’t know people the same way hearies know people- we depend on technology to know first, so we shouldn’t be held to the same standard of ‘knowing’ before ‘friending’. The current Facebook policy of ‘know before friend’ is like telling Deaf people we need to hear someone first before we can wear hearing aids to then be friends with them. Hearing people designed the Facebook policy. I understand it is to prevent spam, but the machine should serve people. As it stands, with the power of Facebook as modern day telephone, this new system subordinates people to the machines programming. It is inhumane to demand Deaf to know before friend because we need the damn technology (be it hearing aids, or now Facebook) to know in the first place! Dig?

Now, I also understand that Facebook can’t just change its friend invite policy just for Deaf people. would they require an audiogram in order to bypass? Seriously. I know. All you people who say Facebook does not discriminate against the Deaf are missing the point. Im not saying Facebook actively singling us out. No! By no means! Understand when I say that! I know! The deal is that Facebook is a representative microcosm of the whole dysconscious Audist structure created by dominant hearing culture. In the same way that everyday people get mad at me when I don’t hear them, now Facebook suspends my friend request ability. Facebook is mad at me for not communicating according to the standards designed by hearing people. Make sense?

Sexual Harassment in the workplace is defined as occurring based on how the victim feels, not the intent of the harasser. Likewise, discrimination is the same. How I feel is what is real, for me, and I know others feel the same. Hearing people can’t deny me how I feel. You don’t have the right to tell me how I feel is wrong. Do you tell women they are wrong to feel exploited? Or blacks they are wrong when they feel they have been subjected to racist attitudes? Or gay people when treated unfairly? No. Deaf, too, suffer- but we suffer on a communication level. And Facebook is a communication tool. Why adhere to a policy about communication rules when I have communication ‘disability’? I goes deeper. It is systemic. Time is nigh to educate society and end the ignorance surrounding how Deaf people feel. When Facebook suspended my friending, I felt my communication channel was cut, and so I get to decide if it was discrimination or harassment. Im tired of hearing people defining my reality! I have a right to legitimate + validate my feelings.

Facebook was the first tool whereby I was able to connect with other Deaf. Until Facebook, Deaf have been kept apart by LAW- if you don’t believe me- google the fact that we have been banned from using sign language, marrying each other, owning property, driving, etc. AGBell caused Deaf people to assimilate + mainstream but his method was epistemically violent because integration required destruction of self-knowledge of Deaf Identity, culture, and language. So, I feel it in my bones, the history of the Deaf being what it is, has residual carry-over into modern day information age that disallows Deaf to meet + communicate on our terms. Facebook says we are supposed to know each other first?

Do you see where this all comes together? Society has kept us apart and the tradition continues, just in another form. Just like slavery has gone from the cotton fields to cheap prison labor, discrimination of Deaf is now manifest in Facebook. We were banned from sign language, and now we are banned from communicating on Facebook. Sure we can join groups and send messages but thats like saying you can use voice phone but not text. Know before Friend? That is discrimination against Deaf because we don’t communicate on that same hearing paradigm.

Im not saying Facebook should let Deaf people friend before we/they ‘know’ people- Im saying it represents dominant culture assumptions about the due process of human social interaction that is Audist in its essence, albeit dysconscious.

To say the Facebook policy is for hearing AND Deaf is like saying these stairs are for walking AND wheelchairs. It doesn’t compute. Transport/mobility accommodations are accepted, yet even in modern information age, communication accommodations are still neglected. images (3)Consider Netflix, who demands customer service be conducted on voice phone, not email, and how they won’t caption unless forced by law. Historically, the Deaf have always been told by hearing people how to communciate… now Facebook is doing it.

Its all just semantics and metaphors anyway. Group, then message, then friend request? What is ‘know’? What is ‘meet’? Especially in age of internet. Deaf have always used assistive devices to ‘meet’. Again, I understand. It is like this game, and the issue we have is with spammers, and the Deaf are collateral damage. This is why I am going to be on Google Plus more because they don’t limit my circles. It is based on passions and interests, rather than who you knew in high school.

I want to end with a quote from “Deaf Subjects (Cultural Front)” by Brenda Jo Brueggemann, location 393 on Kindle: “And why are such devices, when used to aid the deafened ear, commonly referred to as “assistive” or “adaptive” technologies when, after all, technology/ies are- by the very nature of the definition of the term- assistive and adaptive to begin with? Why is it, for example, that a Blackberry in the hands of a hearing person suddenly sheds its adaptive or assistive skin and becomes instead just another device to fill up one’s airport or driving time or conduct one’s business incessantly?” So, in a sense, Facebook is an ‘assistive device’.

Please comment and share this post. Thanks. Also, here is part one of this article.

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Stream Of Consciousness

Hello. My name is David Jonsson. I am Deaf.

I am blogging about my Deafhood- my journey in this life, being in this sensory perceiving body that detects vibrations. Normalcy is enemy of diversity. Let me be. Hearing Aids and technology is fine, but don’t control ME with it. It is a tool for ME.. for ME to detect the vibrations I choose. If you insist on me hearing you, then speak my language. Don’t make me listen to yours. And all this punctuation and complete sentences.. I’m tired of it. I need my own language to express who I am. Visual.

I heard that faith cometh by hearing, and knowledge by seeing.

What else? nothing. Who I am is not to be judged on the basis of my acquisition or my ability to process and consume your information. I speak of ‘your’ because 99.99% of all people my whole life until maybe 2 years ago have been hearing and speaking folks. So I never had confirmation or validity for my perspective, the Deaf-center.. until the internet. So the channel is what allowed the information. Hearing aids my whole life connected me, then internet broadened the range.

Fine. So now what? nothing. I am here, now. This moment has value enough that I can publish my stream of consciousness. What am I saying? nothing. I’m OK with that.. just clicking away on these letters.. creating feelings and energy.. producing.. something. But what? who cares. Why? why not. The function of my post is to feel like I did something. I worked. I.. AM.

Im glad I got fired from my last job.. actually I quit but I didn’t tell them. They were fucking Audist. Wanna hear about it? As brief as I can: I requested texting accommodation and was denied. Furthermore, they insisted that not only I call, but I have to go through an extra hoop and be on phone longer. Essentially speak to the manager just to inform them I’m not coming in. My ears hurt. They didn’t believe me. The denied my request for leave of absence. But then lied about that to the Investigator with EEOC, because I filed a Complaint of Discrimination. Anyway.. so then the fuckin Civil Rights Department decides NO Probable Cause in favor of Respondent. So hearing people defending hearing people. I am still alone. We need Deaf Politics. Deaf people defending Deaf people. I joined NAD. Perhaps I will re-engage them on the situation.

I joined Deaf Club and they all understand my situation- like it’s an everyday thing and suddenly I feel like, you know what, fuck it, im cool. Its all good because Im not the only one. Does Google give my blog a lower ranking for not including apostrophe? How do I make that plural? ASL is better in many regards. Why did they not teach me? I feel denied. I’m not trying to play victim. I am victim.. to Audism, Oralism, Mainstreaming, isolation, ethnocide, epistemic violence, economic oppression, employment discrimination, etc. Don’t fucking tell me this isnt a reality. I must trust how I feel is real for me.

But I AM moving on.. but not for you. I am letting go for me. So I can have peace and just live my life. I don’t want to fight the system.. but I can tell my story and maybe it will make the next generation of Deaf culture a little more accepted because of an understanding I was able to convey. Besides, I can’t keep it all in.

I AM angry. Does that scare you? good. Im standing up, because Im tired of cowering and appeasing and catering to your need to be heard. I hereby put my attention where I choose. Im tired of lipreading and actively listening and not being appreciated for the extra energy I put in and you cant even face me when I need to see you to understand you? You insist on making me use phone when Im standing in your office. You offer me TTY and I have never used that. I’m telling YOU what I need to communicate. Like a ramp for wheelchair, I need texting, not voice. Fuck it. Im done.

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Hearing Privilege: Voice Phone

Hearing privilege means you can call businesses and agencies without worrying that they will hang up on you.

They don’t hang up on me because I have ‘good speech.’
But I only hear about half because I can’t lipread or observe body language.
I hate the phone anymore.
I misunderstood more than I realized.
I was in denial because I wanted to be ‘good’, which meant able-to-hear.
I would fake it.
The consequences are dire however.
I suffered the wrath of assumers who deemed their message conveyed.
Presumption is a hearing privilege.
Cops shoot you in the back if you don’t listen.
Fuck you pig.

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